| Well this is more like a nightmare that led to a wonderful ending. I had an emergency C-section with my son Alex in '96 because "I WAS TOO SMALL"! Yeah right! I just went along with it. When I became preggo with Athena (just 4 weeks after a miscarriage) I was elated....a dream come true. I had done quite a bit of reading and research on VBAC and had my heart set on it. We interviewed an OB and found one that we thought was very supportive. I was classified "high risk" due to the miscarriage so soon before..which I now know to be so bogus. I had an U/S every month and I had a text book pregnancy! I had major braxton hicks the last 2 months....thought I was in full blown labor four times they were so bad....but nothing. Went in for my last weekly appointment and was told that I was "high and tight"....baby was still high and cervix was still tight. Then he informed me that he thought she was bigger then Alex had been and he was afraid that she would get stuck like he did. SO!!!! Being so afraid that I would end up with a baby in NICU that wouldn't BF because the nurses gave him a bottle again....I said go a head! I agreed to the c-section the next week at 40 weeks. Well I went to the hospital and they were prepping me...the nurse couldn't get the IV in....three different nurses tried each sticking me a least twice....only to finally get it in in my arm in a place that made it impossible for me to hold Athena to nurse on that side. Once I got to the OR....the doctors came in talking about their vacation they were leaving for the next day and another mom that had just delivered and they were glad cause they could now go out of town......the anastesiologist (spelling) came in to give me my Epidural...he stuck me 4 times while I am on the table crying so hard my skin hurts....then finally asked me if I wanted to be put to sleep. I cried for 15 min because I so wanted to be awake! Then drifted off to sleep crying. Next thing I know I wake up in recovery and I am THROBBING all over......The worst pain I have ever felt in my life. Way worse than my contractions with Alex....SEVERE PAIN!!!!!!!! I am screaming and moaning and crying.....wanting my baby....I finally got her and got to my room about an hour later. Then for the next 3 days I had a nurse come in and "massage" my uterus to make the bleeding stop. They thought I was going to hemmorage and to top it all off I had my tubes tied during the C-section....I had wanted them tied but now I regret it. These birth experience have clinched my purpose in life. I will be starting Nursing School and then attending Midwifery school in Dallas and hope to open a Birthing Center here in Lubbock. I use my birth experiences to try to help pregnant moms I know make the decision to become more educated and come up with a detailed birth plan and find a doctor that is truly supportive of their ability as a WOMAN to birth thier child with our interferance. I think that no woman should have to endure what I endured and have their woman hood striped from them. This was supposed to be the most joyous time of my life and it will haunt me for the rest of my life. But to GODS grace I have two adorable , loving, beautiful children that are healty and radiant and the light of mommy and daddy's eye!!!! WE LOVE YOU ALEX AND ATHENA!!!!!!! Farrah Moutos
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